HEY loves.
so mariss inspired me back into writing on here, though this might be short because i'm typing left handed.
oh well. it's something, right?
so pretty much i am feeling very busy right now. it's at that point where you just live on a day to day basis, right? like i have to stop thinking about whats due in two days, or three days, and just do what's due tomorrow. sometimes that means staying up till like 3 AM, but that's the only way i can get everything done! honestly, i'd rather sacrifice sleep than a grade, you know? you can always catch up on sleep but not on assignments.
the thing that really gets me is that at any given moment, there are a thousand things i should be doing. if im not doing homework, then it's work. if i've finished work, then it's chores. if it's not chores then it's laundry, if it's not laundry then it's more chores..it's seriously endless. there isn't any time to just be, or to just exist. like today, which is one of those days where i want to sit outside and watch the trees or the grass. or tonight, when the moon is out. because did you know that this time of year, it's 14% bigger and brighter than usual? because when it's closer to the horizon, it appears larger than normal. also, it's at a point in its orbit where it's closest to the earth. the orbit isn't a perfect circle.
am i seriously the only one who is like, obsessed with stars? and the moon? just the perspective of the fact that we're sitting down here on this tiny piece of rock that is proportionally a grain of sand compared to everything else out there. we're like a chapter in a book. no, we're like a sentence. a word in a sentence. a letter in a word in a sentence in a chapter of a book. or just one miniscule pixel in that letter. and the fact that everything here is so giant to us, and the fact that the moon is so far away but appears brighter than anything else in the night, and how you can see the wear and tear and craters that puncture its surface. and how it's really quite large, miles across. and how everything in between us and it is so foreign to us, such a mystery. but despite all this, we still see it, every day, looming right there. kind of teasing us. i would like so much to be there, and it looks as if i could just jump right over there, though i know i would probably die in the process.
and then there's stars, millions of them. like how you can lie in the grass at night and look up and see them all in 2d, like black construction paper with little holes poked in it. but if you stare at a star long enough, it sort of seems to flicker. at least, it looks like that to me. i like to imagine that i can see the flames inside the star falter for a second, or a coment crash into it. best of all is the notion of a supernova. we watched that video in chem class, telling us how the enormous star, a huge mass of fire and gas and explosion and god knows what else, all combusts in a magnificent display of energy and power and then condenses itself to supermatter smaller than the smallest point. my greatest ambition is to see that one day, though there's probably a one in a million chance that i will. smaller than that.
and then there's the factor of light years. how when i see a star flicker or a supernova one day, it all happened too long ago for me to even comprehend. like there could be no stars left in the sky by now, but we wouldn't know for millions of years. am i the only one who thinks about that?

K DONE NOW :) i'm not crazy , i swear...

hiii....so maybe i haven't posted since may.
but you know, it was may 30th, which was almost may 31st, which was almost june. so technically it's pretty much only been a month give or take a few days
anyhow, school ended, summer is here, all that fun stuff.
summer is relaxing and all those good things but it's kind of sad because my friends have been coming and going like trishy is gone now and tim left last saturdayyy and jade left sunday and nikki leaves next sunday..
sighhhh. i will have to find ways to entertain myself!
ps AYANNA GET YOUR BUTT UP HERE. it's summer now, no excuses and yes i do know that you're reading this.
anywayyy, so the other day i was pondering the reason why i actually post on this relic of a blog, and it came to me...you know what will be cool? when all of us (eh..okay....me and cindy and ayanna and occasionally dave and marissa and melanie) who xangaaa will go back one day and look at all of our old silly posts. like my first post was in seventh grade, so i'm thinking that one day i'm going to go back and laugh at how stupid i was and..you should too. it's pretty much guaranteed entertainment.
AHHH IT'S JULY!!! which means, mainly, that its a little closer to august when everything exciting (ie BREAKING DAWN) is happening, and that i'm going to orchestra camp on the 20th.
and no, you're NOT allowed to laugh at me i'm goonnnnaaa meet some people just like me. aka string instrument playing, classical music listening, harry potter loving people.
also, i'd like all of you to know that in fact, i have just bought a ring tone and it happens to be the winter movement of vivaldi's four seasons. and it's freakin' amazing. so if i don't pick up when i call youuu i'm probably listening to that amazing solo..
ahh yes. you wish you were me.
.
naww i'm joking you should call me and i will pick up because you know what? i have absolutely nothing to do, except re read twilight & new moon by august first and see a bunch of musicals that my voice teacher assigned...
neither of which are veryy time consuming, considering the fact that i have way too much time on my hands...
oh well. it's 11:30 (the night is still young ) sooo i'm going to go have a good time.
aka watch the food network/scifi channel.
ttyl

hello, my very neglected and hungry xanga page.
i'm sorry for abandoning you for so long.
youuuu too my faithful xangian friends! i know my last post was like the quintessence of weaknesss....eh. i'll keep up every few months, i promise :[
freshman year is almost over! what? what? i know. it's gone by like...in the blink of an eye. i still feel like i'm gonna get lost and look like an idiot, haha. oh well, i'll be a sophomore, right?
i'm also looking forward to giving the eighth graders i don't like completely wrong directions :] okay, that's so mean. like REALLY mean. teheheheh.
anyway i should be writing an essay right now but uh i'm just warming my fingers up with this post, okay? this is the...pre essay esssayyy. so when it sucks tomorrow, we can tell my english teacher that.
anyway so whats new with me, you ask? quite a bit, in fact.
things i should probably do soon
- study for Bio E/M SAT II....yeah....about that...my review book is staring me down.
- stop eating wheat thins. this is a problem and may require rehab.
- practice for my recital next week...whoops!
- sleep

as you can see, i have clearly been up to more important things than trivial matters such as my  malnourished blog...
that's a lie. i'm sorry, xanga. please don't cry.
by the way, thank you cindy and ayanna (the only two living people who read this)
i think my elephant is cute too.
:]